OMG! I do not remember Clomid doing this to me before. I'm so moody and emotional and crazy. I tried to have a relaxing afternoon on Wednesday, had lunch with Tonya, got a pedicure and my nails done, and got my hair highlighted and cut. I should be totally relaxed! I couldn't feel any less relaxed! What is it going to take? I even got my delivery of Kauai Kookies yesterday for my Anniversary today. I was happy for a moment about it, but then it was gone. I woke up feeling just miserable this morning and I hate how I feel. I even went to therapy yesterday and I thought I'd cry my eyes out and vent and feel better, but no, I was totally fine during the session. I don't even feel like myself. It has got to be the Clomid doing this to me. I'm Bitching at everyone that comes near me and mumbling under my breath about everyone else. I finally put my MP3 player in my ears and I'm just trying to type and work and interact with as few people as possible. I don't even want to be around me, so I know everyone else is like, "Damn what's her problem."
Walter's Mom was admitted to the hospital, not sure for how long, or if it will do any good. I can't even imagine how Walter is feeling right now. His Mom is such a loving and amazing woman. To see her so angry and paranoid and anxious is hard on everyone.
Tara called again last night, of course only my phone, and no message this time. I just don't have anything to say to her and I don't know what's going to happen, but I can't live with her. I'm barely surviving with Noah. I'm deeply sorry I couldn't have done more for her, but I have to take care of myself and protect myself. I cannot be the 'Mom' she's looking for, I'm not sure if anyone can.
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